It's a bad feeling.

Thinking of all the girls you talked to, omg i'm slowly killing my self. All the things you said to them. I feel so low. To make matters worse today i check your "friendship" with your ex girlfriend on FB and you just seemed to respect her more. Also you were trying so hard to be cool with her, while we were dating. Always commenting on her shit. Did you ever really love me, Idk how to feel right now. I'm trying so damn hard. I don't want to anticipate that you are gonna cheat on me or leave, but look how weak i am. i can't even tell you how i feel. I'm at the bottom, omg, i feel so heartbroken. Why can't i be happy, i thought i was gonna find my happiness with you. I really thought i did. When you write things like all the things you said on twitter today, i never really think you;re talking to me. I always feel as if you make it seem like it towards me but in reality you may be thinking of someone else. i have no self esteem. I really want to kill myself. My efforts are pointless, i'm dying inside and my appearance shows it. When will i be happy, when will i get treated right? if things don't workout with you, i'm not gonna date anyone else. Ive never fallen in love until i met you. Sucks to say but i just feel so devastated. God help me.